Sometimes Life's Not Just Another Day at the Beach

Airstreams and Palm Trees

I will tell you one thing, there hasn’t been a day that’s gone by in the last 2 weeks that hasn’t been filled with some sort of confusion, clarity and epiphany.  It seems that I am remodeling my inner world as much as I am remodeling my outer world.

Who knew that the process of painting my cabinet doors would give me the opportunity to be thoughtful about my vulnerability? And just what does it mean to be vulnerable anyway? I can put a whole list of labels on it, but the bottom line is that some days not knowing feels exciting – other days not knowing feels vulnerable. But thankfully I’ve discovered that it’s OK to feel vulnerable. It’s not a good thing nor a bad thing….it just is, and that too shall pass.

I always thought I had faith in myself before, but I realize that I always needed to know where I was going. Today NOT knowing where I’m going and trusting that I am going in the right direction means everything to me.  It still feels a little amazing to realize that I’m not too unnerved by having no idea of what my future holds – but I’m still walking boldly into it.

My mantra pre-Gypsy was “you don’t have to know where you’re going or how you’ll get there – all you have to do is get the Airstream….then and only then will everything begin to unfold”. It’s been 2 weeks – a drop in the ocean compared to the rest of my life. If I move forward I celebrate it. If I need to pause, I allow it. If I stumble, I get back up and take another step. It is all as it should be, don't you think?

BTW - a big thank you to all who have contacted me with comments and support. Your words bring joy to my heart. Even though I am doing this for myself, sharing it with you is pretty cool too.